Follow Up Post: Gender Construction & Violence

As a follow up to my last post, I wanted to draw your attention to a news story aired earlier this month.  The title of the story alone, "Brooke Fantelli, California Transgender Woman, Allegedly Tased in Crotch by Imperial County Desert Rangers," elicits great anger in me.  Not only does this behavior demonstrate violence, but it is a clear example of both prejudice and discrimination (which often lead to violence, hatred, close mindedness, inflexibility, etc. in the first place). Quick reminder: Prejudice is a negative attitude based on faulty generalizations about members of a selected group (usually protected classes), whereas discrimination is an action demonstrating the attitude. They are not mutually exclusive however. For example, an individual may act out a negative or hateful behavior, but not really believe the premise upon which the actions are predicted. Perhaps the person fears loss of friends, a job, etc. if s/he does not perform the behavior. Regardless, these terms are something to keep in mind as we go through life--prejudice and discrimination.

The news story about Brooke Fantelli (there is also a video on the linked news story) and the discrimination she experienced as a result of her status as a transgender woman is horrific. Because her biological sex does not match with her gender presentation she is tazed in the genital region. Really? And, Ms. Fantelli clearly identifies as a female, yet the ranger chose (key word) to use "sir" and "him". I think this is the exact type of story from which I based my last post. Until we achieve a more open, accepting, and supportive society/environment, hate and violence will feed off of our close mindedness. If we do not stand up against such behavior, such perpetrators may believe their actions, their words, and their violence is acceptable. I think a previous comment from the earlier post is right on. Tolerance. While I understand individuals have different views, beliefs, etc. we do not have the right to enforce our own beliefs on others. While I am presenting one view here and explaining my frustration and hoping to educate, I recognize that everyone may not agree with me.

As a last note, while I've merely presented one example of violence above, let us not forget the many, many others who experience similar forms of hate, discrimination, and intolerance. For a further examples, read Angie Zapata's story, and Gwen Araujo's story, and watch a short video about Angie's life below.

New Documentary: "A Way to Justice"

The following is from UNAIDS (www.unaids.org):

A new documentary film following the lives of four people in Africa aims at challenging patriarchy, end men’s violence against women and promote gender equality. Produced by Sonke Gender Justice and MenEngage, the film titled A Way to Justice: Engaging Men for Women’s Rights and Gender Transformation focuses on gender, HIV and human rights issues.

“We need to build creative initiatives, to transform gender norms and break through cultural barriers to create new masculinities. By fostering women and men’s leadership for gender equality, we can succeed in creating safer, more just societies and stopping violence against women and girls.” said Michel Sidibé, Executive Director of UNAIDS.

Violence and the threat of violence hamper women and girls’ ability to adequately protect themselves from HIV infection and assert healthy decision making. The prevalence of forced first sex among adolescent girls younger than 15 years ranges between 11% and 45% globally. Adolescent girls and young women are among the most vulnerable groups to HIV infection.

In the film individuals speak about the difficulties they confronted and transcended. David Tamba, a Sierra Leonean fleeing from civil war whose wife was gang-raped by rebels, began working with other men in refugee camps. “All men were viewed as bad men. But there were also men who were peaceful, who equally suffered, so the way to turn the story around was to start talking to our colleague men and go out and campaign for gender equality and empowerment of women,” said Mr Tamba.

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You can also watch some of the film by clicking here. 

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I'd also like to draw your attention to another film, "Can't Just Fold Your Arms." This film follows 3 activists as they train, discuss, debate, and listen around the reality of South Africa over a period of two years. Read more about this film here. 

What's in a word?

Domestic violence, intimate partner violence, violence against women, partner abuse, domestic terrorism, sexual assault, rape... the list could continue for at least another 5 lines. Alas, what's in a word? What does it really tell us? Are the words really that important if everyone understands? I mean, they do understand, right?

The term for violence between partners has long been debated. Historically domestic violence was the term used; however, problems arose when the term was looked at more critically and individuals began to recognize that partners don't always live in the same domicile and if we do consider all parties living under one roof, then won't we also need to consider violence between siblings?

Furthermore, though slowly changing, how do we account for violence between partners of all sexualities? Not all people are allowed to marry; thus, it's crucial we not use language that excludes the consideration of violence among all people, regardless of personal characteristics.

Also, what about the gendered nature of such language? We know statistically that men are more often perpetrators of violence toward women than are women toward men. Consequently, is it not more exact and correct to call a spade a spade and use the term violence against women?

A final piece of food for thought today is how the use of narrow or broad terms may impact various components of our battle to end violence against women.  If we use a narrow term, such as rape, how might that affect the feelings or understanding of a woman about her experience if she was not "raped" but was indeed sexually assaulted?  Does this contribute to her likelihood of trivializing, minimizing, or self-shaming and self-blaming?  Sexual assault is the crime that goes most underreported.  If we use language that allows or asks a woman to redefine her experience, she will be less likely to report it and seek physical and/or emotional support. Additionally, use of a broad term allows for a woman who has perhaps experienced multiple acts of sexual violence to understand each experience as such.

Critiques of broad language? Well, are you familiar with the phrase, "everything but the kitchen sink"?  Use of broad language can create a breakdown of communication between individuals as they attempt to understand exactly what happened. Moreover, it is much more difficult to accurately and effectively study and discuss 50 behaviors as opposed to 1 specific behavior. In other words, if you are interested in rape, then use the word rape. If you are discussing workplace sexual harassment, then use this term.  Similarly, use of terms such as domestic violence or intimate partner violence include a myriad of forms of violence: physical, emotional, economic, etc.

So, what's in a word? Quite a bit. The language we choose to use in our everyday lives can tell a person quite a lot about the ways we think about violence (or any other topic really).  Just think about the following:

• Rape vs. sexual assault vs. Non-consensual sexual interaction
• Female genital mutilation vs. Female genital cutting vs. Female circumcision
• Intimate partner abuse vs. Intimate partner assault vs. Intimate partner violence
• Same-sex intimate partner violence vs. Opposite-sex intimate partner violence
• Same-sex physical assault vs. Opposite-sex economic abuse
• Violence against women  vs. Violence

Is it important to know the couple is a teen dating couple versus an elderly couple? Is it important to know that the couple is same-sex or opposite-sex?

So, how do you feel about all of this? What comes to mind when you think of the word "assault"? Now, what about the word "abuse"?  Is it important? What words do you choose to use when discussing these topics? Let's get this dialogue rolling! No, seriously. Leave a comment. Tell me what you think and then come back later to see what others have said. So ask yourself: